A Post of Two Halves

I write this post with a heavy heart, those closest to me will know the reasons why and for those that don't, higher powers prevent me from talking openly, hence the self censorship.



I will just say that what may have seemed Romantic to me years ago, now just seems so terribly tragic and utterly heart-breaking. I am trying to apply a positive attitude using the metaphor of being stuck in the forest. You would aim for the spaces not the trees to find your way out, it is the same in life, why would I focus on the obstacles? I am embracing the good points I have scrabbled together and occupying myself with goals, organising get togethers and ploughing my energy into the things that will produce positive outcomes.



Last week I felt incredibly supported and will use my blog to publicly thank them-you know who you are. Unfortunately, personal dramas caused by people stuck in their own bubble, one of confusion and spite ,meant some of our precious time was stolen from us. However, it resulted in feelings of pure vindication; it wasn't me after all and I feel I can finally put the whole drama to bed. I had reached out and at some point that friendship could have been saved, but it has been totally broken now. A strong relationship destroyed by so called feelings of 'perception', manipulation and pure dishonesty. I just hope they can build the confidence to form their own opinions and become less impressionable; it's a dangerous vulnerability to have.

On to brighter things: I have a friend over tomorrow night, I have some crap girlie films to watch (Russell Brand in St.Trinians, yes please) and Ben and Jerry's on stand-by. Me and Aimee are sharing a similar experience and if I have learnt one thing recently, it is that it's good to talk, to share feelings and basically connect with people. Otherwise you can feel very isolated and create false situations. There are friendly people everywhere, you just have to be open to them.

Anyway, I know I promised you a recipe for profiteroles but this chef is tired and must rest her weary head. Manana, manana. xxx